随笔
Nothing will change, will they?
It's like someone else is draining faith out of me. Now I'm feeling hopeless, helpless, filled with loneliness.
I can't hold on to it. It seems like I'm not able to hold on to anything. I'm losing things around me.
And I'm wondering whether I'm even losing myself.
It's frightening. I'm trembling.
Just wanna have you. Just wanna let you know.
Coward! Yelled myself.
So what. I am really afraid. I live with cautious. I am afraid that I'll even lose the chance to just speak with you. I am afraid that you'll hate me and run away from me.
Even now I am sometimes invisible to you.
Tried to get into your world but it seems that you just won't let me to. It's like being shut out of the doors.
It's killing me. I'm not sure how long I can handle this.
Please.
...